Suck It Bittersweet Bitches

Suck It Bittersweet Bitches

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Life is Constantly Changing: So Should We.

God, Its been a while since I've updated this, huh? 
Where do I begin, where to start.  
Well, If any of you fuckfaces actually cared; My summer was the best and most fucked up I've ever had.
Half of it was spent with my toker buddy and fucking guys like a whore.
I guess that's probably how I should begin.
You see, it all changed one night when I was fucking this guy, he had a girlfriend. I didn't even care.
I was too numb and dead and didn't give a shit about anything. And, this moment happened.
We were walking home, and this guy showed up. He had this feeling to him, It resembled something of, how do I put it...
Feeling. 

He had these eyes, you know? They were like ice formed into diamonds. And they brought me back to life, something that'd long been dead.
His name is Justin. 
We met up a few times, smoked some tree,  Exchanged numbers. See where this is leading?
It was like every story I had come to remorse and despise.
But it happened; we met up alone; away from the disgusting whore and slimeball I was screwing around with then.
We walked around this college I live by, and he blew my mind. He could understand and think on my level. Theorize my ideas on quantum physics (A post I will make later,) and what life may really be, whats after death, what death is.
He inspired a feeling in me that day, I remember it so very vividly.
We were just coming out of this parking lot, it was sunny and bright out, and his hair was golden. 
Those diamond eyes saw right through me, pierced the layers of deadness and decay within myself.
I fell In love right then.


Now, here's where it gets tricky; Because I still had this strong desire to abstain from all love, from all relationships.
I didn't, or, maybe couldn't possibly believe in this hormonal reaction we've all come to know as 'love'.
A mixture of chemicals and electricity within our brains that create "feelings." But I've come to learn many things from this man, Justin. One of which, is how to differentiate between REAL FEELINGS, and HORMONES.

About 3 weeks later he asked me out, his first girlfriend. 
Isn't that just adorable? The virgin boy falling in love with the dead whore. 
Lets call It Frankensteins' lover.
How long has it been? Oh dear lord, Eight Months.
Eight months of raging sex, weed, and rebuilding.

Got some new friends, better friends, burned the rest.
Friends I can get fucked up with, friends I can count on. And friends that can count on me.
Turnes out though, I'm dating a high school celebrity, Oh, that always leads to some 'fun' dispositions with other whores. In any case, My life is damn good, 
There are downsides, upsides, but thats just how it goes normally.

Now, I'm not gunna pretend to think that any of you people possibly reading this actually give a fuck, After all, this is the internet. But, I will say that I'm grateful for everything I have. and all the bad shit that's happened; I rightfully deserve all their wrath. 


But its easter, a happy day to celebrate someone dying and resurrecting themselves in the name of "God."
My boyfriend is at his family house, playing with his nephews, and I'm at home, Listening to the cunt of a woman who birthed this wreck, bitch about everything she doesn't have. What a wonderful day, right?
But, its all good. Life doesn't always meet your expectations, doesn't mean that the day is worthless.

Now, I don't know what any of you are planning, but I'm gunna light up, sit back, and play my guitar for a while.
Hey, why don't you guys get off the computer and spend time with your families? You may find their just slightly more tolerable then last time.
So Get Blazed People!
and, as always,
Suck it bittersweet, bitches.